The Journey Begins

It was SO great to see the show last night, the most difficult part being that I couldn't laugh out loud when things were funny! I have worked with many of the cast members, the writer/director and the choreographer and it was so good to see them all - on and off the stage (I tell you, I have some wicked talented friends) - and I was on the receiving end of innumerable bear hugs. Fantastic. Armed with my notebook, I had "conversations" with all my peeps, none of whom I'd seen since the silence began and each one dealt with it differently. It was hilarious. One held up a finger, grabbed my notebook and wrote his response, one whispered, one started using his own version of sign language, and others were relatively "normal." The best thing was that every one of them noticed quickly how their behavior had changed as a result of my "condition" and we all had a good laugh (mine remained silent this time). It was interesting to have a conversation in a group setting as well. People were talking and then, when something was directed at me, a complete stillness fell over the group as I wrote down my response. It was like an extended breath in the conversation and it was amazing to feel the energy of those moments.

Earlier in the day after yoga I went next door to Cafe Gratitude to order one of their quinoa lunch bowls to go. I flashed my index card, wrote down my order, paid and waited at the counter. When the server brought it over she said, "Okay, Oh Silent One, here you go, 'You Are Accepting.'" I have since begun signing emails with my name and then (aka Oh Silent One). Favorite nickname ever. I had only flashed my "I'm not using my voice" index card to one person, but as I waited for my food a few others spoke to me as well. Instead of flashing the card or making some huge I-can't-talk gesture, I used smiles and body language to respond and it worked quite nicely. I then realized I don't have to explain myself to everyone everywhere I go and I've decided to try that for a while.

Well, I'm about to hit the road. The three-week retreat begins tomorrow and I'm going to drive half-way tonight so I don't have to leave at four o'clock in the morning! And so the journey begins....